Do you demand perfection in all areas of your life, from home to work and everything in between? It seems like a noble aspiration…even one we should all possibly strive for. However, perfectionism actually makes people miserable. Perfectionistic attitudes can defeat you when you least expect it causing depression. Overcoming perfectionism can be challenging since it is generally a very deep-seated habit.
Perfectionists encounter many problems with everyday living. They usually feel they are letting down those around them (including themselves) in both personal and professional relationships. They have to understand that NOTHING is ever perfect. Life is full of uncertainty. According to Alistair Ostell, a lecturer in psychology at the University of Bradford Management Center in England, perfectionists are more susceptible to emotional and physical problems. They often show symptoms of insomnia, chronic fatigue, high blood pressure, depression and heart palpitations. These symptoms occur at a much higher rate than in those who are more flexible or open-minded.
“If there's one thing perfectionism does, it rigidifies behavior,” author Hara Estroff Marano says in his Psychology Today article. “It constricts people just when the fast-moving world requires more flexibility and comfort with ambiguity than ever. It turns people into success slaves.”
Perfectionism, at its most extreme, can actually paralyze people when their compulsive desire to be perfect overrides reality. This leads to stress-related illnesses, relationship problems, low self-esteem, a decrease in productivity and sometimes as extreme as suicidal thoughts.
How do you know if perfectionism is paralyzing you? Do you ever think the following self-limiting beliefs? How often do the following limiting beliefs keep you from achieving your goals and dreams?
- I must rigidly control everything in my life
- People will not like me if I am not perfect
- If someone criticizes me, they must be stupid
- If I didn't achieve a goal, I must be a failure
- It's NOT OK to make a mistake
- I get depressed when something doesn't come out like I planned
- If I can't do it to my standards, I just won't do it
“This is not to say that you shouldn’t strive to do your best. It’s just that if you force yourself to be perfect all the time you’ll never feel like you are,” Hale Dwoskin of the Sedona Method says. “The best way to release your desire for perfection is to let go of wanting to be perfect or to create perfection,” he continues. “It is also extremely helpful to allow yourself to love or accept yourself as you are. The more you love and accept yourself as you are, and the more you allow yourself to accept your performance, the happier you’ll feel, and the more likely you’ll be to produce stellar results.”
It's helpful to note that even the 7 wonders of the world are not perfect. Let go of the feeling that you must be perfect and placing unrealistic expectations upon yourself. The reality is that even if you're not perfect, you can still be GREAT. Overcoming Perfectionism can greatly free up your creativity and allow you to become the person you were meant to be.
Friday, March 20, 2009
Monday, February 16, 2009
Take On the "Small Stuff" and Conquer It.
One of my favorite books is "The Slight Edge", by Jeff Olson. Success arrives at your door step when you persistently do small tasks on a consistent basis, like the story about the "Tortoise and the Hare". You can scramble about doing "busy work", shuffling papers, hopping about from one task to another without focusing on the small tasks and get nowhere. However, by organizing your tasks, taking them on one at at time and doing them consistently, you WILL reach your goals. Reaching your goals brings about Greatness in your life.
Max Steingart shared the following:
SUCCESSFUL ACTION IS CUMULATIVE IN RESULTS.
Success is the sum of small efforts, repeated day in and day out.
Many people take the first step and then stop.Yet, with every additional step you take, you enhance immensely the value of your first step.
All masters of success are chiefly distinguished by their power of adding a second, a third, and perhaps a forth step in a continuous line.
There is no royal road to anything. One thing at a time, all things in succession is the rule of life.
That which grows fast, withers as rapidly. That which grows slowly, endures.
Do not despise the bottom rings in your ascent to greatness.
Max Steingart shared the following:
SUCCESSFUL ACTION IS CUMULATIVE IN RESULTS.
Success is the sum of small efforts, repeated day in and day out.
Many people take the first step and then stop.Yet, with every additional step you take, you enhance immensely the value of your first step.
All masters of success are chiefly distinguished by their power of adding a second, a third, and perhaps a forth step in a continuous line.
There is no royal road to anything. One thing at a time, all things in succession is the rule of life.
That which grows fast, withers as rapidly. That which grows slowly, endures.
Do not despise the bottom rings in your ascent to greatness.
Friday, February 13, 2009
Are You A Winner or a Whiner?
What is winning? Is it crossing the finish line first....ALWAYS? Or is winning persistence? Without persistence you simply cannot win. Winning is not LUCK.....it is generally the culmination of lots of hard work done on a consistent basis.
Here are some thoughts from Dennis Waitley about Winning.
Winning Is........
Winning is never whining.
Winning is coming in fourth, exhausted but excited, because you came in fifth last time.
Winning is being glad you're you.
Winning is feeling, there is no ceiling.
Winning is beginning, and by beginning, the game is half won.
Winning is all in the attitude!
Where do you want to be in your life? I want to be winning, even if it ISN'T first place everytime. It's doing my best, staying in the game and persisting.
Here are some thoughts from Dennis Waitley about Winning.
Winning Is........
Winning is never whining.
Winning is coming in fourth, exhausted but excited, because you came in fifth last time.
Winning is being glad you're you.
Winning is feeling, there is no ceiling.
Winning is beginning, and by beginning, the game is half won.
Winning is all in the attitude!
Where do you want to be in your life? I want to be winning, even if it ISN'T first place everytime. It's doing my best, staying in the game and persisting.
Thursday, February 12, 2009
Make Your Dreams Your Reality
by Max Steingart
You have the power and the opportunity to change your life.
You can make anything you want of it.
It's not difficult; it just takes some effort.
See things as you would have them to be instead of as they are.
Develop a personal plan that focuses on what you want, not on what you have.
Your imagination will show you how to turn possibility into reality.
Visualize your goals and your subconscious will work toward making those mental pictures come true.
When you picture yourself as vividly winning, that alone will contribute immeasurably to your success.
Knowing your destination is all you need to get there.
You have the power and the opportunity to change your life.
You can make anything you want of it.
It's not difficult; it just takes some effort.
See things as you would have them to be instead of as they are.
Develop a personal plan that focuses on what you want, not on what you have.
Your imagination will show you how to turn possibility into reality.
Visualize your goals and your subconscious will work toward making those mental pictures come true.
When you picture yourself as vividly winning, that alone will contribute immeasurably to your success.
Knowing your destination is all you need to get there.
Monday, February 9, 2009
Have You Had Your Dose Of Laughter Today?
Being in a home based business for myself, and working out of my home sometimes feels a little lonely. When I start to feel isolated, I know it's time for a good dose of laughter. Laughter is one of the simple joys of life; and recent studies say we need 12 laughs a day just to stay healthy!
The following was taken from "Laughter is an Instant Vacation". It's contents will make you laugh out loud.
Here's a little sampling that I hope will make your day a little brighter!
If you look like your passport photo, you're too ill to travel.
-Will Kommen
I once shook hands with Pat Boone and my whole right side sobered up.
-Dean Martin
I'm not going to vacuum 'til Sears makes one you can ride on.
-Roseanne Barr
The most remarkable thing about my mother is that for 30 years she served us nothing but leftovers. The original meal has never been found.
-Calvin Trillin
My grandmother was a very tough woman. She buried three husbands and two of them were just napping.
-Rita Rudner
My husband wanted one of those big-screen TV's for his birthday. So I just moved his chair closer to the one we have already.
-Wendy Liebman
I hate housework! You make the beds, you do the dishes - and six months later you have to start all over again.
-Joan Rivers
My grandmother is over eighty and still doesn't need glasses. Drinks right out of the bottle.
-Henny Youngman
Inside me there's a thin person struggling to get out, but I can usually sedate him with four or five cupcakes.
-Bob Thaves
He that falls in love with himself will have no rivals.
-Ben Franklin
I haven't spoken to my wife in years. I didn't want to interrupt her.
-Rodney Dangerfield
My doctor is wonderful. Once, when I couldn't afford an operation, he touched up the x-rays.
-Joey Bishop
These made me laugh. I hope they do the same for you.
The following was taken from "Laughter is an Instant Vacation". It's contents will make you laugh out loud.
Here's a little sampling that I hope will make your day a little brighter!
If you look like your passport photo, you're too ill to travel.
-Will Kommen
I once shook hands with Pat Boone and my whole right side sobered up.
-Dean Martin
I'm not going to vacuum 'til Sears makes one you can ride on.
-Roseanne Barr
The most remarkable thing about my mother is that for 30 years she served us nothing but leftovers. The original meal has never been found.
-Calvin Trillin
My grandmother was a very tough woman. She buried three husbands and two of them were just napping.
-Rita Rudner
My husband wanted one of those big-screen TV's for his birthday. So I just moved his chair closer to the one we have already.
-Wendy Liebman
I hate housework! You make the beds, you do the dishes - and six months later you have to start all over again.
-Joan Rivers
My grandmother is over eighty and still doesn't need glasses. Drinks right out of the bottle.
-Henny Youngman
Inside me there's a thin person struggling to get out, but I can usually sedate him with four or five cupcakes.
-Bob Thaves
He that falls in love with himself will have no rivals.
-Ben Franklin
I haven't spoken to my wife in years. I didn't want to interrupt her.
-Rodney Dangerfield
My doctor is wonderful. Once, when I couldn't afford an operation, he touched up the x-rays.
-Joey Bishop
These made me laugh. I hope they do the same for you.
Tuesday, December 2, 2008
Are You In Network Marketing But Afraid to Tell Anyone About It?
Did you start out your Network Marketing business by making a list of all your family, friends, co-workers and anyone else you've known since Kindergarten? Then very excitedly told them about what a great product and business opportunity you had. What was their response? Probably not exactly what you expected. They didn't share your enthusiasm. What a downer. Now what? Crawl back into your cave and stay there until a customer or prospect miraculously drops out of the sky?
That's the thinking of someone who is broke and will probably stay there. The only way you are going to get your message, product, or opportunity out there is to promote yourself. Do you realize that wealthy people promote themselves all the time? How else did they get where they are? Can you imagine Donald Trump hiding in his office waiting for good opportunities to appear? He's a "make it happen" kinda guy. Who else can you think of that is famous and YES rich? Let's talk about Jack Canfield of the Chicken Soup for the Soul series. Do you know that he talked to 140 publishing companies before he was finally published? What if he had quit after the first rejection? Our world would NOT be a better place for it. Our world is a much better place with the Chicken Soup series.
Are you then depriving the world of the quality product or service you have to offer? First of all, I should back up a little; do you have a strong positive belief in your product or service? Is there a demand for it? Promoting yourself is all about belief in yourself and what you are offering. Have you done your research on the market for what you are selling? Where would you find the people who need your product or service? With a little bit of effort, i.e., research, you can find many people who would benefit from what you have to offer.
Sure, the Law of Attraction is real. However, the Law of Attraction without the use of the Law of Action doesn't get you very far. YUK!! You mean I have to take ACTION? Does that mean stepping out of my comfort zone? YES! Are you supposed to be comfortable with every action you take? No!! No one is comfortable with every new endeavor they embark upon. But what separates the rich from the not so rich (broke) is action. They move forward even though it might be uncomfortable. Rich people take action; broke people make excuses.
The only way to get comfortable with a new undertaking is to do it. Have you ever heard of the "Ready, Shoot, Aim" principle? Contrary to what we are taught, "Ready, Aim, Shoot", life is a series of small readjustments. When driving a car, we are constantly making tiny adjustments with the steering wheel to stay in our lane, ultimately getting to our destination. We are off-course more than we are on-course. However, we don't get in our car, aim for our destination and just drive without making adjustments. Your Network Marketing (MLM) business is like that. You prepare yourself (Ready), but not "analysis paralysis", by gaining knowledge of your product, service and company. Then you take action (Shoot), by letting people know what you have to offer – promoting. As you are taking action, you constantly adjust what you are saying or doing as you get better with your presentation (Aim). Competency comes with practice.
If your goal is to become wealthy, you must take action. You must promote yourself and your product or service. Don't be shy about it. There are many tools out there to help you promote yourself. I belong to an organization that is dedicated to just that…getting yourself heard in a low rejection environment. Without that, I was just as scared and shy as you might be feeling. A good marketing system builds confidence. Systems are duplicatable; people are not. We can teach you to find no-cost or low-cost leads. I would be happy to help you TAKE ACTION.
That's the thinking of someone who is broke and will probably stay there. The only way you are going to get your message, product, or opportunity out there is to promote yourself. Do you realize that wealthy people promote themselves all the time? How else did they get where they are? Can you imagine Donald Trump hiding in his office waiting for good opportunities to appear? He's a "make it happen" kinda guy. Who else can you think of that is famous and YES rich? Let's talk about Jack Canfield of the Chicken Soup for the Soul series. Do you know that he talked to 140 publishing companies before he was finally published? What if he had quit after the first rejection? Our world would NOT be a better place for it. Our world is a much better place with the Chicken Soup series.
Are you then depriving the world of the quality product or service you have to offer? First of all, I should back up a little; do you have a strong positive belief in your product or service? Is there a demand for it? Promoting yourself is all about belief in yourself and what you are offering. Have you done your research on the market for what you are selling? Where would you find the people who need your product or service? With a little bit of effort, i.e., research, you can find many people who would benefit from what you have to offer.
Sure, the Law of Attraction is real. However, the Law of Attraction without the use of the Law of Action doesn't get you very far. YUK!! You mean I have to take ACTION? Does that mean stepping out of my comfort zone? YES! Are you supposed to be comfortable with every action you take? No!! No one is comfortable with every new endeavor they embark upon. But what separates the rich from the not so rich (broke) is action. They move forward even though it might be uncomfortable. Rich people take action; broke people make excuses.
The only way to get comfortable with a new undertaking is to do it. Have you ever heard of the "Ready, Shoot, Aim" principle? Contrary to what we are taught, "Ready, Aim, Shoot", life is a series of small readjustments. When driving a car, we are constantly making tiny adjustments with the steering wheel to stay in our lane, ultimately getting to our destination. We are off-course more than we are on-course. However, we don't get in our car, aim for our destination and just drive without making adjustments. Your Network Marketing (MLM) business is like that. You prepare yourself (Ready), but not "analysis paralysis", by gaining knowledge of your product, service and company. Then you take action (Shoot), by letting people know what you have to offer – promoting. As you are taking action, you constantly adjust what you are saying or doing as you get better with your presentation (Aim). Competency comes with practice.
If your goal is to become wealthy, you must take action. You must promote yourself and your product or service. Don't be shy about it. There are many tools out there to help you promote yourself. I belong to an organization that is dedicated to just that…getting yourself heard in a low rejection environment. Without that, I was just as scared and shy as you might be feeling. A good marketing system builds confidence. Systems are duplicatable; people are not. We can teach you to find no-cost or low-cost leads. I would be happy to help you TAKE ACTION.
Friday, November 14, 2008
"If I Weren't Afraid"....
In response to a question I was asked,i.e., "If I Weren't Afraid..." what would I do, I wrote the following poem. Hope you enjoy it as much as I enjoyed writing and thinking about the topic.
I am a professional Network Marketer. Therefore, as part of my personal development, I must face my fears daily and overcome them to be successful. Anything worth having requires work. But working smart is the real answer and charging ahead without fear are the real keys to success.
IF I WEREN'T AFRAID
If I Weren't Afraid...
I'd write a children's book
And, have it published
So everyone could look...
Through rose colored glasses
At a world without worry.
A world slowed down
No one in a hurry.
If I Weren't Afraid...
I would own my life,
Without trivial concerns
Far from stress and strife....
I would fear nothing.
I'd kick up my heels.
I'd dance with the moon
From no one to conceal.
How happy I'd be,
As free as the wind.
New adventures pursued
The fun would never end.
If I Weren't Afraid...
I'd fly high and free,
Skipping across rainbows
New worlds would I see.
So I say to myself,
What's stopping you,
From reaching up high,
Grabbing new things to do?
Only the darkness of fear
Keeps me from obtaining my dreams.
No real obsticles in the way,
Just my own limits it seems.
So, from this moment on,
I will fear no more.
My dreams I'll pursue,
Adventures behind every door.
Come fly with me,
Grab tightly my hand.
We'll glide smoothly along,
Like the motion of hourglass and sand.
Do not fear anything,
Fate has wrtten your play.
All you must do now,
Is discover the day.
I am a professional Network Marketer. Therefore, as part of my personal development, I must face my fears daily and overcome them to be successful. Anything worth having requires work. But working smart is the real answer and charging ahead without fear are the real keys to success.
IF I WEREN'T AFRAID
If I Weren't Afraid...
I'd write a children's book
And, have it published
So everyone could look...
Through rose colored glasses
At a world without worry.
A world slowed down
No one in a hurry.
If I Weren't Afraid...
I would own my life,
Without trivial concerns
Far from stress and strife....
I would fear nothing.
I'd kick up my heels.
I'd dance with the moon
From no one to conceal.
How happy I'd be,
As free as the wind.
New adventures pursued
The fun would never end.
If I Weren't Afraid...
I'd fly high and free,
Skipping across rainbows
New worlds would I see.
So I say to myself,
What's stopping you,
From reaching up high,
Grabbing new things to do?
Only the darkness of fear
Keeps me from obtaining my dreams.
No real obsticles in the way,
Just my own limits it seems.
So, from this moment on,
I will fear no more.
My dreams I'll pursue,
Adventures behind every door.
Come fly with me,
Grab tightly my hand.
We'll glide smoothly along,
Like the motion of hourglass and sand.
Do not fear anything,
Fate has wrtten your play.
All you must do now,
Is discover the day.
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